Thursday, April 28, 2011

Carole King Idol...i.e. songs no one has ever heard.

American Idol is the KING of strrreeaattccching a show to fill a time slot. Last night started off with a  35 minute introduction of  followed by a 20 minute recap of Kenneth  Edmonds career...blah blah if you don't already know who these people are, chances are you don't care to learn about them on a karaoke show. It was apparent last night that IDOL is done with . They dressed him in the lamest outfit I've seen and put him in the first slot after he was in the bottom 2 last week. To make matters worse he sang a song with the lyrics "My sweet baby that's not like those other girls,"... c'mon man...really? Following the train on Jacob's dress was .While I still don't think she's in it to win it, her likability and talent make me think she's got a pretty strong following...she's just been pretty blah to me lately performance wise. After Lauren was the 1st time filler duet of the night. In my opinion duet was phenomenal and the only one of the night that was worth watching. She's amazing. After that wonderfulness came how is this twat still around he sang one of my favorite/one of the only ones that I know, Carole King Songs, for him, he did ok but gosh I hate this guy. Ryan Seacrest called him "Scotty the body"...really? and once he performed he did this dbag look into the camera...ugh I wish someone would  him in his stupid crooked face . For the 2nd week in a row I was kinda impressed with James Durbin...last night I got the sense that he may win...I have no idea why he would win...and if that happens I foresee him, and Idol going off into the abyss with  and the rest of the non-successful Idol camp. Maybe they can all start a new band with . After James was the 2nd duet of the night. looked like this during her duet with . Reason being...he cannot sing with other people and he dumped a big bucket of douche juice all over her talent...this kid has got to go!  said Lauren you're amazing..oh and twatty, it's hard to sing second behind a voice like that. Casey and all his coolness followed that train wreck. He is the only guy that I like and I think he is crazy talented...but it wasn't my favorite performance of his...I don't even know if anyone has ever heard that song before. I'm nervous for him tonight.










 was the last performance of the night. HOPEFULLY that slot will work for her and she won't be in the bottom this week, I'd say she was in the top 2 performances of the night and GENNIFAH said she has one of the best voices in the competition...I'm going to "wishful thinking" and say that despite her consistency in the bottom 3, this girl is a dark horse and is going to make the finals...and hopefully win! I think her or Lauren are the only ones that have the potential to capitalize on winning and have a successful career. Closing the show was the biggest  of all. Jacob and James did a duet...there isn't even anything to say.
I'm not sure if they'll do a bottom 2 or 3 this week but my bet  &  with Rupaul going home...but I hope it's Scotty.

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

These is hard times.

I realize that times are tough for a lot of folks right now, and I am VERY grateful to have employment. I'm even more grateful for the "are you kidding me" moments that happy nearly everyday. Priority one of my job is to find employment for clients that are un/under employed by offering various tools to assist them in re entering the work force.Yesterday a co-worker and I were looking over some resumes, which is really the first impression a new employer has of you right?...after thinking it over, I decided I would let everyone know what NOT to put on your resume. I realize that a lot of this may seem far fetched or exaggerated but I promise, it's all true. (Names have been changed to hide individuals sad identity).. I've complied the TOP  things you shouldn't put on your resume.


1. your resume should be professional, clean, easy to read...and unless you're applying for a job at  it should NEVER BE HAND WRITTEN. Do this only if you're trying to stay on unemployment!

Ok so now that we are aware that resumes should be typed, lets discuss some things you shouldn't include in your typed resume:

2. Unless you are a NO ONE cares about your religion so please do not include that.

3. There is also no need to include your age or gender, even if you're name is Jesse or Terry or some other (gender neutral) name, it's no longer cool to discriminate based on gender so again, irrelevant.

4. Your Someone Else's future employer also could care less if you are single, married or  which apparently there is a cake market for???  &  Really?

5. Unless you are auditioning for a movie role, there is no need to include your weight The only person that cares is you...I'm more concerned with why that man painted his toenails? WTH.

6. I've seen more than one resume with the names and ages of every child and grandchild listed...Unless your applying to a stupid reality show...why???

7. You should have taken your objective off of your resume by now...why it was ever a good idea I'm not sure but if you must keep it, please don't have most VAGUE/obvious objective i.e. Objective: To find employment...oh so that's why you made this resume, sorry bro you wasted your time.

8. It is no longer 1986 so everyone should have an email address by now...and most do. That said, as EASY and FREE as it is to create an email...Why, YummyMommy69@whatever.com when applying to a daycare would you not make a new more approprite email, you too ladyofthenite@gmail , stealyoho@areyoukidding and cougarontheprowl4u@igiveup what misfire is going on in your brain that you think anyone will take you seriously with that at the top of your resume.

Now, hopefully no one reading this has any of that crap on their resume...but if you do,  for this free service. If you have one, which you should, make sure your cover letter is an actual letter and not a  stuck to the front of your resume...and there is no need for the cover letter to say "cover letter", trust me, they know what it is. Finally, after you've got your resume nice and clean...please don't go all origami on the poor thing just so it will fit into a tiny envelope  they make large envelopes you idiot, you're not writing to your you're trying to get a job.

Thursday, April 21, 2011

21st Century Douche


Idol opened the show with one of the most random/terrible performances EVER. They brought back the eliminated top 13 and had them perform as a group. First, other than  and maybe Paul...no one wants to see these losers...that's why they got eliminated. They sang "Rock star" by Pink...which as you can imagine Really suited Paul's Rod Stewarty voice. Ugh, waste of time. One thing that I did enjoy about this episode was the contestants opinion's of each other...everyone said Jacob was a ! Surprised?  I hate this kid so much I'm not even going to say his name. By far, he did the WORST last night, AND idol had him on first so hopefully he'll be out of here tonight. My only tip for him is straighten out your freakin head/neck...good Lord you're annoying.
bye McDoucher. Now, don't judge me but I actually liked James Durbin last night...probably 100% because he sang my favorite MUSE song ever, had a drum line, and did pretty well. still not loving him though. Haley went next and I CANNOT FIGURE OUT WHY SHE KEEPS GETTING BAD REVIEWS FROM THE JUDGES AND GETTING STUCK IN THE BOTTOM 3!!!  This girl's voice is literally phenomenal...it's strong and smoky and growly and nasty and pure...It's perfect, yet twatty and all those other losers keep getting better reviews WTF. She sang "rolling in the deep" by my fave, I thought she killed it...she better not be in bottom 2 this week you idiots! Jacob Lusk... went next. Now even I feel bad saying something mean about someone singing about their dead father. He did ok...same ol' dramatic mess. This guy is talented but I guarantee this will be his album cover  because he's sooo freaking boring!! The Geico Caveman Casey Abrams went next. I've been on the fence with this guy but I thought he did a great job with Maroon 5. However, I thought it was lame and outdated that he borrowed his outfit from the  set.  Stefano went next. Everyone on his "confession" vid talked about how big of a flirt he was, how cute he was, basically how horny he was...que Gennifah stealing Steven Tyler's Pashmina to sit on for the rest of the show. Stefano sang "closer" by Ne-Yo. I thought he did pretty well but in my opinion the dancing was a little premature...you're not  yet Homez. In my opinion, from the beginning, the contest has been  to lose. And she's trying her best to lose, last night's theme was 21st century songs and she picks "Born to Fly" by Sarah Evans, mediocre song and artist...REALLY? Do you want to win? Ugh.
Based only on performances last night (remember I was nice to James) I think the bottom 3 will be    & . My vote is for Scotty getting the boot, TERRIBLE SONG, WORST PERFORMANCE and he went first. Fingers Crossed!