ok now picture the set from 
Mad Men. Ok, now take away every cool aspect of that set and that's my 
Using this generic cubicle as a base...imagine that the cubicle walls are a deep shade of 70's maroon, well 2 of them are, the other 2 are two different shades/tones of wood paneling. The desk top is a greenish/blue marble pattern and the carpet is/was tan but has now been waterstained beyond recognition due to the rain that comes in through the double doors directly in front of my computer. These 
are the saving grace of my cubicle. They let in TONS of sunlight, and most days, after 2pm I become that loser that 
. Well not actually but I've thought about it. My office manager was kind enough to get a tint to put on the door but it was applied so poorly that it resembles the tint you may see today on a 1991 Ford Probe.
. All this combined with the lady in the cube next to me
that talks SO LOUD on her phone that regardless of where the person on the other line is, they could just hang up and still hear her...save your minutes playa...and I still love my office. This may have 
program that starts filming here next Monday. I started in this office in November...so needless to say, other than the suprisingly active to have such a sedintary body type woman that I have a direct view into her life thanks to my double doors, there wasn't much activity during the winter months. However as soon as the temps began to rise our first exhibit opened.
Termites!! The way they were tearing up my wood paneling you would've thought they were at 
(she's at golden corral). Thankfully they were quickly taken care of by Bill the Bug guy...that's how he introduced himself. At this point I didn't think anything about termites, I mean this building ( a former morgue) was built in the early 1880's so that's to be expected. However, when I started to hear baby birds in the 
above my doors, I realized I was in Dr. Doolittle 3...or is it 4? Better yet...no one cares. When we contacted the building mangaer (this is not the only part of the building with birds in the signs/walls/cieling/etc. His response "I'm only worried about em if they's bats". Really? (Don't read this)
Just because I'm not going to get rabies or turn into
doesn't mean I'm not at risk. So now that we are close to completeing the circle of life (termites eaten by birds eaten by...SNAKES). Yep, I stepped out of my door to talk on the phone and saw a ball of snakes 
directly outside my door, literally less than 10 feet from where I sit. Well I bring everyone out to look, and it's determined that they are harmless...but I don't care. We call 
...may or may not be his name, I didn't catch it, and he laid out a "sticky pad" and lured the snakes out with cinammon oil??? Never heard of that. Well, it worked. I went outside 5 minutes after he left and saw (actual photo)
there are 4 in the pic, he caught a total of 8, and some got away b/c they simply slithered over their unfortunate buddies that were trapped. He said he sealed up the hole so any that were left can't get out...but all I can imagine is that they are now under the building and will soon be falling from the 
that is DIRECTLY above my head. If and when that happens...if I survive 
I may be asking for a transfer. I mean, I did want to be a Zoo Keeper when I was 7 but this is crazy.
! Up first was 
. His choice was "amazed" by Lonestar. Needless to say I was not amazed...well that was too easy. Beyonce gave a lot of positive
She obviously looks better (stylist) but her stage presence and confidence just isn't there...but she's barely 16 so it's understandable. She sang 
"wild one". Perfect for a karaoke bar...or just a bar but not for the top 3 on American idol. Even if she would've knocked it out of the park, which she didn't, it would have been lame. Not a good round for her! Finally, the winner 
came out and you could tell that Beyonce was very impressed with her, more so than the others. She sang a Zepplin song that I've never heard but she slayed it! She's the only one left that has any performance quality, she has the best voice AND she's FEARLESS!! It was pretty cool that her dad got to play guitar on stage with her during this first song 
but it wasn't cool that she 
fell down right in front of the judging table. That said, round 1 EASILY goes to her beating out the snooze fests that went before her...and for once the judges agreed with me. Round 2 was Jimmy Iovine's round. For 
he picked "Are you gonna kiss me or not". The judges thought he was amazing, said Garth Brooks and Bruce Springsteen had a baby tonight and it's you...are you kidding...this kid has basically same the same song 50 times...he's a one trick 
. He picked "if I die young" by The Band Perry for Lauren, which I thought was a great choice. She did ok to start with but flubbed the ending and her nerves... and her age definitely showed throughout the first 2 rounds...again rough round for her. In what is probably, in my opinion, the best pick of the season, Jimmy picked 
"Rhiannon" for Haley. Now, if you look back in previous blogs, several weeks ago I said Idol should have Stevie and Haley perform on the finale...just sayin! Haley's performance could probably win the Idol crew an Emmy. She looked amazing, the lighting was perfect, she had a fan blowing her hair...and she sang it flawlessly!
To no one's surprise the judges didn't love it and they said that Howdy Doody won round 2...are you kidding me? During the commercial break Beyonce premiered her new video for her new song that I HATE! The vid was petty cool though, kind of a glamorous (thanks fergie) Dooms Day/Mad Max feel...she has a pair of hyena's as pets!! 
. Anyway, Round 3 was the judges pick, unlike previous seasons (because this one is rigged) the judges 
they picked "she believes in me" by 
. I thought it was one of his weakest performances EVER, he strained in his upper register...however the judges loved him. Gennifah 
even let the 
It was her most pageant-y performance to date...I'm nervous for her. The judges loved it and Jennifer said she had won the round...BEFORE HALEY EVEN WENT! Could they be more obvious as to who they want in the finals?? Haley sang "You Outta know" by alanis morisette for her final performance. Guess what...she was amazing! She has no nerves, can fall down and still sound better than her competition and hits a home run every time!! Will all that, she still came across as the underdog...I think it's obvious that the producers want Scotty to win...no way is Lauren going to out sell 
and ...can you think of a successful white male idol winner...NOPE. Hopefully the calluses on my thumbs from dialing and re-dialing were enough to get Haley into the finals...if not, well I guess it's not that big of a deal but I probably won't watch.
to mentor the final 4 contestants...but made us wait til the second half of the show to see her. Each contestant sang 2 songs...the first being one that 
inspires them. James opened the show with the white people bar anthem "Don't Stop Believing" by Journey. His reason for choosing this song...because he "hasn't stopped believing" since he got to Idol. Good Lord, please shut up.
I havent' stopped believing that he's annoying as hell and waaaaaaaaaay to cheesy but I'm not singing about it.
He ended this performance...and his next performance by throwing his arm in the air and fire shooting from the stage. Get over yourself. If Adam Lambert was on this season, by comparison alone you wouldn't have made the top24. Just because you have an eyebrow twitch
and don't wear mascara doesn't mean you aren't a 2nd class version of a D list celebrity 
. Surprise Surprise the judges loved him, sang his praises...gag. For his second song he "sang" love potion #9. What kind of choice is that?? He did better with this one that the first...but again decked out in leather, metal studs and one ear ring (Rocker Douche Must-haves). Unless something weird happens He'll be in the Top 3...but I won't be upset if he left.
went next. She sang "Earth Song" by 
. Her explanation as to why the song inspired her was great, as was her performance. I didn't love how the church choir sounded paired with her voice, but it was still really good. Surprise Surprise 
& 
didn't like it. Randy kept running off at the mouth until a very pissed off Haley tells him "I've already heard what you have to say". Steven Tyler 
i.e. the only one with that isn't deaf...told her not to listen to them...she was great. For her 2nd, GAGA coached song she sang "I who have nothing" Gaga loved her and Haley murdered the song. This time all 3 judges gave her another standing O, second week in a row, and said it was her best performance on the show. Needless to say
for her 3,000,000 times but I'm worried that her snarky back talking may have gotten her into some trouble. Fingers crossed!
went next. He opened with the smartest/lamest song choice of the night. He sang the 9/11 Death to 
anthem "Where were you when the world stopped turning". Given recent events...smart choice young man...however it sounded like every other thing you've sang and the fact that you cried makes me want to VOM. Gennifah said "I'm in lub wich u" ??? what... a 
. For his gaga song he sang some cheesy awful song. During his coaching session with one of the most creative people in the world, he clung to the crucifix around his neck, and kept kissing it. He kept throwing holy water on her and screaming 
. Gaga said after he left..."He's more conservative than I expected". He twisted around the stage with his crooked neck sewn to his right shoulder, his eyes bulging out and looking douchier than ever ...(see below)
. Of everyone he should go home tonight...he just doesn't have what it takes to win...and he's soo annoying!
She looked good and sang better than I've heard her sing probably the entire season. For the 
session Lauren sang Elvis' "trouble". She tiptoed around and didn't want to say she was "evil" Gaga talked her into playing a character and she did, performance wise, better than ever!
. She was in the bottom 2 last week but I'm confident that she will make the top 3!
and hope 
takes his crooked face home!